Yes, you can quit your nanny job! As a nanny, you have found what you think is the perfect job fit for you: decent hours, fair pay, health/dental insurance benefits, the freedom to set your day-to-day schedule of activities, and the cherry on top well-behaved children, so naturally you sign a contract with the family and become their nanny.
However, as time goes by, weeks or even months you realize that this family is not a right fit for you, and after trying your best to make it work the only solution, you’re left with is to QUIT!
So, what could have happened? why do Nannies quit?
Poor Communication
I once worked with a family whom I thought had the silliest (for lack of a better word) form of communication with me. We never spoke about the children face to face instead we communicated thru a journal that was kept in the kitchen and every day I was to write down what the children did for the day along with anything, in particular, I wanted the parents to know of and they, in turn, would reply to me on the journal. Crazy right …yeah, I know! and as you can guess, it was a short working relationship.
Communication is the foundation of a nanny, parent work relationship and therefore a lot of focus should be placed on making sure that the communication line is open and healthy at all times in other for both parties to be successful in raising the children.
At the beginning of the working relationship, parents should be as open and clear with the nanny in discussing what is it, they are looking for in a nanny, their child-raising philosophy, discipline methods, and their likes and dislike when it comes to their home.
A Nanny should quit a job if she does not feel like the lines of communication are not clear and open or if her voice is not given a chance to be heard in a safe environment.
As individuals with different backgrounds and often as can be the case a bit of a language barrier, we may not always agree on the day-to-day methods of dealing with children but unless your child is being placed in emotional or physical danger trust in the nanny and her expertise and know that she is doing what is best in the long-term raising of the children.
Do monthly to quarterly seat down check-in with the nanny to see if there are any concerns or things, she may be unhappy with, and express what you’re happy with and things that may need to be worked on.
You’ve Become the Maid
it starts with a “oh could you do ect..” or “do you mind doing ect” and you say yes because you’re being nice in the moment but before you know it, parents are requiring you to do extra task that were not agreed upon, nor in your contract and worst you’re not being compensated to for.
A Nanny job is to care for the children and anything that has to do with the children such as the children’s meals, tiding after them, and their laundry (I personally do not enjoy doing my own laundry, so I definitely won’t do anyone else’s lol). Nannies are not maids there to help around the house with the parent’s chores. If the parents do ask for extra help, be sure to communicate that is not your job or responsibility. It is tiring and time consuming enough to have to care for children, to then top it with maid work.
Be sure to let the parents know, that if additional work is expected of you, they will have to also increase your pay effective immediately. Parents often tend to think, since they are already paying for a nanny why spend more money hiring a cleaner, those same parents tend to be the ones who want to pay the least hourly. Nannies and Maid are not the same!
If you find yourself in a situation where you are made to work beyond what was agreed upon and not compensated for the extra work, it is time to find another nanny position.
You’ve Burn out.
Being a nanny is no walk in the park, the job often comes with low pay and high demands. In an age where the cost of living is getting higher and higher, nannies are turning to working extra-long hours to be able to bring home extra money.
Working early hours for a family you barely like, juggling multiple hats on the job from playing entertainer, mother, driver, doctor, teacher, negotiator, and friend, then juggling your own life as a student, mother, partner, and sometimes all three to then waking up day after day, week after week and year after year of the same bullshit. (because let’s be honest, that’s what it is ) will have you burn out to the point, you are at work and your nanny kid is having a tantrum, mom shows no interest in parenting and you decide that’s it, I quit!
Toxic Environment
As a Nanny, you hear it a million times. “You are a part of the family”. Although it is great to able to form such a strong bond with the nanny to the point that she becomes in a sense an extended part of the family, the reality is that the nanny is not family and as such a certain form of decorum should be held around them.
As a nanny, you have a front-row to everything that goes on in the home, and as life would have it, some things can’t always be contained behind closed doors. Yet as employers, it is still your job to maintain a proper work environment during the working hours of the nanny as the home is the nanny’s “office” and a hostile work environment doesn’t produce good results.
Marital issues should not be played out Infront of the nanny, if possible, go into another room or outside to have a private discussion. unfortunately, I’ve heard too many stories from nannies of their employers playing out their family dramas Infront of them which causes a toxic and stressful work environment that eventually results in the nanny quitting.
Inconsistent Pay
It is not uncommon for a nanny’s schedule to change from what the original hour was agreed upon. As children grow, their needs change and parents often find themself in need of more help and can ask you to work overtime. Overtime should always be paid as time and a half. Meaning if you are paid $20 an hour, time and a half will be $30. Overtime should be paid in cash of possible.
Journal and keep track of the work hours and any overtime that you have worked, be sure to looking into your salary to insure it matches what you’ve earn.
If you are being underpaid for your work, speak up and let the family know that your wage does not match the hours that you have worked. Often it can just be a mistake in communication with payroll if you’re being paid thru a payroll service or the parents may have had an oversite.
If the problem persists, it is time to look for another job. This is how you make a living, and you should be paid on time with your full wage. If you decide to leave your nanny position and the family still owes you money, you have the right to sue the family for your wages thru the court system.
Better Job Opportunity
Let’s be honest, as nannies, we do not make hundreds of thousands of dollars. the price of living keeps going up and wages are not. Like anyone else, nannies have financial responsibilities such as families, rent, and mortgages. A great nanny is easy to spot, and families are willing to pay extra to be able to have a great nanny work with them. If a job opportunity comes with the offer of better pay and benefits, do take it.
No matter how close and attached you may be to the family, it is still business. Do matter sure to comply to the guidelines of your nanny contract if there is one in place and give the proper notice. In the case of no nanny contract a good rule of thumb is to give 1 month notice to allow the family to be able to find proper replacement.
Disliking The Family .
I personally have never met a nanny who has liked every family she or he has worked with. At times a nanny may take on a job opportunity simply because no better job opportunity was available at the time.
Personalities don’t always mesh, and children are not always angelic as parents tell themselves they are. Work gets even more stressful when the parents are home since children tend to behave badly with the parents ‘at home to react to their every whine, making a nanny’s job that much harder.
Nothing is worst then having to go day after day to a job you do not want to be. Having to grin and bear it due to financial responsibilities.
Be sure to look for another job while working and going on weekend job interviews if possible. A better fit is sure to come up.
Micromanaging Mother.
Every Nanny has had or heard of a micromanaging employer; they usually tend to be the mother. A nanny is chosen and hired because her resume as shown that she has the years and experience to raise a child.
Nothing is worse than constantly having someone over your shoulder trying to tell you how to do your job, as if you’ve not being doing the same thing for years. The worst are micromanaging mothers who say ” well the books say this and that” to quote my own mother ” common sense was here before books” you it.
An experience nanny knows what she is doing and a new nanny needs to be given the space to learn .
Unless your child is in harm’s way, do give the nanny SPACE to do her job, as all nannies know, children behave badly when the parents are around in other to get their way. A parents presence does more harm than good.
Paying someone a salary to care for your children does not mean you get the right to micromanage their every move. After all, if you have so much time, might as well raise your children yourself, no?
Conclusion
In conclusion, being a nanny is hard work. Nannies play so many roles on a day to day it can take a toll on your mental health. Adding difficult parents to the mix is enough to make anyone go crazy. Remember, you have the right as a nanny to quit your job position at any given time, even for something as simple as you do not like the way the paint is drying on the wall. Be sure to follow your nanny contract guideline on the proper amount of time you need to give the family before quitting and be respectful in your exit. Your name and reputation are very important as a nanny, be sure to leave with them still intact.